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Strangers - Silk Thread Growing Through the Glass Tube Bisecting the Abdomen of a Cecropia Moth Hatched in Captivity - DNA - Nothing Here.

from 2​,​020 Knives by Ada Rook

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lyrics

If I could become
a stranger to this place
once again
I would hide between the years
and live there
but in the present day
the entropy remains
every time I find a home
I just want to run away

[...] The way the sun hits
the corners of my room
it reminds me of a dream I had
of a world where i was still afraid
but where I also belonged
deep in the sunlit cracks
in the pavement
sometimes, late at night
I look up the names
of the things that were done to me
and I try to imagine them
slithering through my blood
coiled around my DNA

And on the bus to somewhere else
I felt like a wasted stray
run away forget it all again
and disappear
aching longing for a lifetime
from someone else's mind
can I be someone else
and I leave this all behind?

The cold Vancouver rain
I don't know who to blame
for the hole
that i feel inside my brain
is there a way to feel
like I can be something
more than this
a rusted-out carcass
of the dreams
that I still remember
take me back
I want to know
what safety feels like

I was supposed to be a person
I was supposed to be
a fucking person
they asked me what I wanted to be
but I didn't know
I couldn't know
they made me forget
I still don't know
sometimes I feel like a wasp egg
parasitizing a beautiful insect
hatching into a fungus,
a rare bird,
a silk thread that reaches
all the way up into the sky

There's nothing here for me
and I just keep staring at the sky
I hate everything I am
oh god please let me die
I remember feeling something
like hope before the end
I want to start again...

Why does everyone
feel so far away?
I don't understand
what I am anymore.
And in the light
I can see myself
in a different life
******* ** *** ****

It was so long ago
it was so long ago...

it was so long

ago

credits

from 2​,​020 Knives, released May 31, 2020

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Ada Rook Toronto, Ontario

im rook from black dresses

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